Dear Family,
Today is the 15th anniversary of Mother's passing on January 15th, 1985. At
her marriage in July 1920, she was twenty-two. When Daddy died on January 23rd, 1939, they had been married fewer than nineteen years. She was to live on for nearly forty-seven more years as a widow.
While I was a graduate student at Notre Dame in the mid -1950s,Mother wrote to me frequently. Following are brief excerpts from some of her letters in the fall of 1955.
At the time, Joan, Frank and Ken were still at home. Joan was a nurse;
Frank and Ken were in college. I had resumed seriously courting Marie
McNichol after a nearly five year gap. We begin with the first World Series
victory of our beloved Brooklyn Dodgers over the hated New York Yankees! [I
make no corrections in the text of the letters. Quotation marks are omitted.]
Dear Warren
Tues. Oct 4, 1955
.With the Dodgers now the hero's as of today hope things will settle down, it sure has been tense, wondering if Mary Joe has any finger nails left. Ken
had off today ...and thought the last few minutes of the game he would have a fit, the final blow he run to the door just to tell anyone that happened to
pass. Joan sat in the chair with a long face on she claims to favor the
Yanks.
Anna phoned today "quote I guess Warren isn't going to have time to write to me since he has to be writing to Marie" ... If you get a few minutes try and
drop a few lines to Aunt Anna. By now and be good
Sat Morning (Oct. 8, 1955)
Received your "Personal" for Mother only this A.M. ....Dont be wishing your life away, at times absences are good it makes one think a little deeper,
from the gist of your letter the young lady must be offering you much
encouragement
.Outside of plenty of orange juice & "rest" there isnt much besides
aspirin, sometimes those four way cold pills are good Why dont you get a
rain hat instead of putting it off. enclosing a check for one hat, a good
sunday dinner and extra orange juice. "No books of any kind on my check."
Be good
.Last Thurs. Joe taking the car into Hempstead was hit broadside by a
college student, there car had to be towed to the garage, the boy had
insurance ....its a blessing Joe wasn't hurt.
Tues Morning (Oct. 11, 1955)
....Do hope by now you have recovered from your cold, Frank also has a bad one, justs coughs all night. Someday that boy will learn to take care of
himself the hard way of cause....Guess my daughter [Joan] will be on her
way to California shortly...Can't say I'm happy about her going but then she is old enough to know I keep thinking about the lonely roads they will have to travel.....Just had a nice surprise Aunt Anna walked in, she was glad to get your letter
Sat afternoon (Oct. 15, 1955)
...Frank & Ken are going up to the Mt.V. to a dance tonight, they are riding up with Barb. and Jack.... The bad part is that {Marie & Joe] are lost for
the need of the car, several times Joan has rode out there early and Marie
has to drive her back to the hospital and then pick her up again. Joan then
rides Marie back to Uniondale so its a merry go round.....Joan just came in
from work I want her to take me over to the school to register [to vote]
this is the last day.....Well I hope you have a nice time at dinner with
Father Hughes I bet you feel real important. Does Marie [McNichol] write
regularly to you? Got to go now
Sunday Afternoon (Oct. 23, 1955)
Know you will be looking for a letter, so decided to write before reading
the papers.Marie & Joe are still without a car....they are rather discouraged, its hard for her to get around without it. Robert is making a retreat this week, he to is a bit upset about his house [Lynbrook}, doesnt seem to be selling as fast as he expected. Haven't heard from James in awhile last Ken heard he {James} intended to go on a hunting trip for a week.....I am sending a box with a few necessary items, according to the last remarks in your letter you need them...take care of yourself will write again in a few days
Sat Morn. (Nov. 5, 1955)
....This past week has been a really depressing one.....James left at 4:00 this A.M. for a hunting trip in the Maine woods, he phoned to say goodbys
last night, well three goodbys in one week is just too much. {Me back to
ND; Joan starting her cross-country trip].....Before I forget to remind you
again about Annas birthday on Nov 13. I know how she looks forward to
hearing from you....I'm sure Kay isnt too happy about James going away, but
she says perhaps he"ll get it out of his system...it is rather strange for me
not to be having Sunday dinner for the family.
Monday Morning (Nov. 7, 1955)
While the washing machine is romping along thought it a good time to dash off a few lines. Received your first letter...also one from Joan, needless to say she has [not] passed by your way {ND} due to the weather conditions. As of last night they were in Tulsa Oklahoma....Had a nice day with Robert &
Shirley yesterday, Frank went with me, we took a ride to see his [Bob's]
friend Gabe's new home in Syosset L.I.
What a place really beautiful
Wed Morn (Nov. 9, 1955)
....Well the most important news, the girls had an accident in Amarillo
Texas. Joan phoned last night to tell me, it happened Monday some time, she
was driving and in passing a truck, skid on the wet snow and the car
overturned. She assures me and will say she sounded alright....Of cause
being upset I missed some of the details....Needless to say this just aboutfloored me, hardly slept last night at all....My hand is really shaking
Sat Morn (Nov. 12, 1957)
Robert and myself just returned from the air port after meeting Joan....Joan
took a plane last night All she wanted to do was come home and was might
happy to see Robert and me at 6:45 this A.M....Thank God she is home looking a bit worn never wanting to see Texas again. I am hapy to see her and hope to relax a bit...
Sat Morn (Nov. 19, 1957)
.....Floating a loan [for an engagement ring], Robert doesn't think it a
good idea to start off that way... of cause thats just an echo of my
thoughts. I told you I would help but dont know just how much you have in
mind to loan. Most girls like a rather decent size ring or else they are
rather ashamed to show it. This is a problem you will have to think out
sanely without letting your heart run away with your head.
Expect the Nolans "Lynbrook" for Thanksgiving dinner also Anna & Chester,
Sophye. Marie {Koch] will be in later in the day. Rob finally settled their
car accident for $165. it cost them $185
Sat. 2:00 (Nov. 26, 1955)
....Have enough turkey for today but ready for a new taste tomorrow. Can't
say my bird was too tender, had it in the oven for five hours but had a hard
time cutting the legs etc. By this time everyone was starved, the vegetables
were looking limp, so think at Christmas I will get my bird in my own butcher
shop. It was nice talking to you {on the phone] altho with the noise at this
end its a little hard to hear. [Having expended my resources on a trip home
in early November to become "secretly" engaged, I could not afford to come
home for Thanksgiving.] ...Robert has taken a binder on his house...Believe
the people have a base until March so that will give them some time to look
around....will write more later have been busy this week, take care of
yourself.....
Monday ( Dec. 12, 1955)
Guess this will be the last letter before your trip home.... It {foot
problems] sure has me down, with so much to do, haven't been able to get any shopping or the million and one things before the holidays. I am writing
some Christmas cards that will be a job done....Robert & Shirley were out
house hunting and from reports last night real disgusted....All this is
making it more convincing for Marie & Joe to enlarge their house as they had
it up to their necks looking.
Well dear nothing else to say - O we took care of sending the flowers [to
Marie McNichol for her birthday] and I had Joan mail a card from us all. As
ever
Love, Mother
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How did it all turn out? Marie McNichol and I became formally engaged for
Christmas, 1955. We were married on Nov. 24, 1956. I spent half of 1957 in the Army. We gave Aunt Anna a nice present on her 67th birthday, November 13, 1957 - our twin daughters.... Joan returned to nursing at Mercy Hospital. She married Peter Reehil in October, 1957; she never returned to Texas....Bob and Shirley bought a new house in Merrick - just in time, and later moved on to Huntington....James went hunting and was never heard from again - just kidding....Marie and Joe did add on to their house and now its a nice B & B for our LI visits....Frank graduated from St. Peter's in June, 1956 and went on to ND for graduate work in math - where he met a girl named Rosemarie....Ken did a brief sojourn in the Paulists, graduated from St. Francis College, got his MSW at Fordham and disappeared into the U.S. Army, finally making his way, via Vietnam, to Texas. Along the way, he added another beautiful Marie to our family.
And Mother. Mother soldiered on for nearly thirty years. She had chronic
physical complaints and continued to worry a lot about us. Like the loaves
and fishes, her love grew to embrace her many grandchildren and
great-grandchildren. She missed the big party in 1998 in honor of her 100th
birthday, but we all had the feeling that she was there in spirit, and that
she continues to watch over us - and worry about us.
Love to all,
Warren
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